First step is knowing what you want
Knowing what you want can be a challenging question. We all live our lives following so much rules and having so much obligations, we don’t always have time to think about what we really desire. And i don’t mean the new TV that just came out or other material matters (although if that is what really really would make you happy, who am I to judge). My question would be, where are you in life, are you happy, if not what do you wish for to change that? It is a hard question as we let our thoughts be caged by obstacles. Dreaming is something most of us forgot how to do. Furthermore, if you have responsibilities such as kids or a mortgage, finding the liberty to think outside the box can be hard. Yet not impossible. If your life had absolutely no limits, what would you choose to have and what would you choose to do?
Did you ever thought about sharing your wish?
I came across this TedX talk by Barbara Sher who I think does an amazing talk about how using our social skills can help us get what we want. I don’t mean this in a sociopathic kind of way. Don’t use people to get your dream realised, instead dare to ask around and see what happens. You might be surprised how resourceful people are. Though we live in a narcissistic age where “I” is getting more important everyday, we are still a social species that relies on cooperation to survive and thrive. Many philosophers, psychologists, even economists and other have tried to comprehend human behaviour. This article on human nature (one of many!) explains some of it, you can make your own assessment on wether you find humans cooperative or not.
Don’t be ashamed of needing someone else
As the stoic Marcus Aurelius once said: “Don’t be ashamed of needing help. You have a duty to fulfill just like a soldier on the wall of battle. So what if you are injured and can’t climb up without another soldier’s help?” The art of asking for help is a noble one. When you need it.
Did you ever asked for what you want? How did that go for you? Did you in the end find a way to get what you wanted? I would love to hear your thoughts from you!